Lana Del Rey: “I wish I was dead already”.
Lana Del Rey hit the headlines this week with her controversial statement in an interview with The Guardian where, after referring to her idols Kurt Cobain and Amy Winehouse, she said ‘I wish I was dead already’. In response to the interviewer’s reaction she insisted: “I do! I don’t want to have to keep doing this. But I am.”
The singer, 28, went on to talk about the differences between how her life appears to outsiders, and how she experiences it herself. “”Family members will come on the road with me and say: ‘Wow, your life is just like a movie!'” She said, according to The Guardian. “And I’m like: ‘Yeah, a really ******-up movie.'”
A common theme in the stories of people who have found great success in certain careers, whether in showbiz, music, business, or anywhere else, is the discrepancy between how their lives – which are often seen as glamorous, exciting and ‘easy’ – are perceived by others, and how they are in reality. Loneliness, exhaustion, extreme stress, anxiety, depression and strained relationships can all become part of life in the limelight, either as an underlying characteristic or at certain times amongst the daily grind of living. And having others around you referring to your life as ‘exciting’, ‘amazing’, or ‘glamorous’, when in reality it is anything but, can feel very isolating, and can add to the immense strain and pressures already present.
At The Grove we understand how different peoples’ lives can feel inside from what is promoted on the outside. We understand what a lonely place it feels when you are unable to talk about how you really feel, and have to continuously put on a ‘brave face’ for those around you. And the greater the discrepancies between inside and out, the greater the feelings of distress that arise because of it: being able to talk about feeling low, depressed or anxious is relieving in itself, so when this opportunity is unavailable things tend to fester.
Our counsellors and therapists are experienced in working with people who have experienced success in their professional lives, but who are feeling distressed within themselves and their personal sphere. We understand the temptation to carry on working hard, to keep on achieving and to capitalise on that drive to reach the top, and we know that over-working is often used as a means to avoid underlying difficult feelings. And this can be addictive – the more we work and achieve the more we are driven to work and achieve, and thus the further we become from our real selves and wants and needs. Like Lana Del Rey, the dread of feeling that we have to keep on and on doing the same thing and fighting the same fight with no respite can lead to thoughts of suicide and idealising over what it would be like to no longer exist. Some people act of these fantasies, and actively act to take their own lives.
If all this sounds familiar and you would like to talk to someone contact The Grove today. We offer a free 30-minute assessment, and will pair you up with a counsellor who will be able to work with you. We will explore what is going on for you, and how you are really feeling, and together we can work towards a better future for you.